What influences your child's personality?

How a child uses his inborn traits — whether those will be strengthened or subdued — will be influenced throughout his childhood by three or four factors:
1. Relationships. Your relationship with your child will have a greater impact on him than that of any other person, so do all you can to nurture him. Also seek to help him develop mutually uplifting relations with siblings, grandparents, friends and others.
2. The way he is educated. Be involved in your child's education to ensure that your child's classroom is suited to his makeup. I'm not suggesting that you ask his teacher to cater to your child but to be sure she recognizes his personality traits, builds up his strengths, and encourages him to overcome weaknesses. In some cases, you may even decide that homeschooling is the best option for you and your child.
3. The environment in which he lives. Make sure your household provides your child a rich environment — and I'm not talking about material trappings. Two children with similar personalities — one of whom isn't appreciated or encouraged and another who is supported while he explores his interests and passions — will respond differently to life.
4. Trauma in early childhood. This last influence may be important to consider if you are raising a child who has been abused or neglected. You may have difficulty separating his innate character traits from those that have evolved out of fear of punishment. One adoptive father noticed his child's compulsion to clean or organize but recognized that his preference for keeping his room neat could either indicate the child's innate love for order or stem from fear. It is possible the child thought that he had been beaten for not keeping his room clean or mistakenly thought neatness would help him be more accepted. Since they were not sure what drove his neatness, this child's adoptive parents were careful not to focus too much praise on that behavior.
In a healthy home, a child's strongest traits generally will follow him from infancy through adulthood. Some kids truly do love to line of up their things in organized ways, from their shoes to their toys! And those strong, innate traits are likely to impact both of you on a daily basis.